![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNqMaLIXJLrjINq6LDGl_aj9osDavamhcplRAUZyD0iBycLRaG_nQGNPKJn_TcuhgJysKTpwk8H5PJD-jJXkyvOIIcHKMSQkYabhkrtj6n70a62S7nK7yyIr1PdICPMmaw1d9siX-Yxtk/s200/legend+7.bmp)
Boyd's Bear Cubs
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
I am Legend
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNqMaLIXJLrjINq6LDGl_aj9osDavamhcplRAUZyD0iBycLRaG_nQGNPKJn_TcuhgJysKTpwk8H5PJD-jJXkyvOIIcHKMSQkYabhkrtj6n70a62S7nK7yyIr1PdICPMmaw1d9siX-Yxtk/s200/legend+7.bmp)
Friday, January 27, 2012
Kindergarten Already?
I called the Van Buren School District office today to find out what school HaLeigh will go to in the fall. I have obviously known she was almost 5 but after I got off the phone with the secretary reality set in that HaLeigh really isn't 2 years old any more. I admit I know we've been buying larger clothes and kids makeup instead of binkys but what has happened here? Yikes!! HaLeigh Jade Boyd has been one of the brightest lights of my life for a little over three years now. She was 19 months old when I first laid eyes on her. She thinks her life would be incomplete without her brother and truly it would be. HaLeigh is spunky, girlie and incredibly sweet. I remember taking her home for the first time. It was incredibly overwhelming to take a child from someone knowing she didn't know you and that she would not be going back to the place she had called home. I remember squeezing her and asking her if she wanted to go home and be my baby. She took her binky out of her mouth and said 'yes'. I said, ok, I'll be your mama then. We went from there to FireHouse Subs where I first got in trouble with her. I didn't think she'd want her pickle. I started to eat it and she freaked out on me. She kept saying, "NO!". Little did I know that she had an eating disorder because of her neglect at her biological family's home. I had already made my first mistake with her and I'd only had her a few hours. Live and learn, thankfully. I remember the first fit she ever threw. Michael and I stood and watched and smiled because we realized she was no longer afraid of us. She was so good for a few days, never doing anything out of the ordinary, never resisting us. She was scared. That didn't last long. We were glad. I remember the fit she had when she saw her brother with us for the first time. She pointed and screamed and tried to take him away from me. She said nonsense words for thirty minutes but every once in a while she said 'baby' recognizably. It was so beautiful. She recognized her brother. She and Legend had been separated for months until they came to live with us. Now my baby tells me that the author of a book writes the words and that the illustrator draws the pictures. She also heard me teasing AshLeigh about something and then saying j/k j/k. She came to my alphabet rescue and said Mama, the next letter is L,....J, K, L Mama. I think she thought I was stuck on K. She's growing beautifully and we have many more milestones ahead but I'm sure like every other mom I can truly say I wasn't ready to think about her being in Kindergarten.
Thursday, December 15, 2011
It's All In The Details
I worked graduation last night. Michael and I met for lunch and he took the van so he could pick up the kids and I took the truck. However, I realized I didn't have a key to the truck about 4:30. I asked Michael to bring me a key and leave it in the truck. He said no problem. As I was about to leave the Stubblefield Center it started raining hard. A friend gave me a ride to the truck. I have had a sinus infection for six weeks. I've taken two rounds of antibiotics and a week of steroids. I am much better but I have been sick for a while. When I got to the truck there was no key. I called him immediately. Michael, where is the key?? He said he had left it under the mat on the driver's side. I was having this conversation with him as I was standing in the cold pouring down rain without an umbrella. I had picked up the mat and looked everywhere underneath it. I had used my phone as a flashlight and looked everywhere. I touched every square inch of carpeting underneath that mat. I told him I couldn't find it. He said well I can load up all five kids and drive to you in the pouring down rain if you like. That was it. I was done. It wasn't my fault I couldn't find the key. It wasn't my fault I had to work graduation and it wasn't my fault it was raining. I told him not to try to make me feel guilty because I couldn't help it. I said, give me more details, describe to me exactly where you left it, talk it through. It just didn't make sense that someone would take the key and nothing else!! He sighed and told me he left the key exactly halfway between the tailgate and the fender wall. Instantly I realized he was saying he had left the key underneath the bed liner not the floor mat. I was drenched at this point and praying I wouldn't come down with pnuemonia. I went to the bed of the truck and found the key. I said Michael you left out the most important detail....which mat. Never once did he say........bed mat or bed liner. This experience was a lot like our experience with infertility. Even though his desire to have a child was very strong his desire was nothing like mine. We could have talked forever and not ever reached the same feeling or idea. Many times I felt like I was the only one who was trying to deal with the pain which compounded my hurt. We were on different planes. As my wounds healed I realized he was hurt too and probably just as much but just like where he put the key he literally couldn't communicate about it because all he was thinking about was having to take all our kids to come get me when he knew he had left the key. All I could think about was that he didn't want the baby as badly as I did but I've changed my mind about that. I've learned to ask Michael very specific questions. We got married and hoped to get pregnant right away. Eighteen months later I was weeping because I had accepted the fact that we had a problem and I might not ever have children. Michael asked what was wrong. I asked him if it was me he wanted or the baby we wanted to have. He gave a marriage strengthening response: I don't care if our child comes from your body or an adoption agency or China. I want you and I want you and I to be parents together. Our prayer was answered and I must admit I don't have pneumonia or even feel any worse today and once in a while Michael answers questions exactly perfectly.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
It'll Never Wash Out
![]() |
The Perfect Easter Dress |
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
My First Blog
![]() |
Baby Shower Cake for Haleigh |
![]() |
Baby Shower Cake for Legend |
My kids make me laugh. I couldn't begin to describe the joy or the stress for which they are responsible. We became a family by a very non-traditional route. I want to share the beauty of the broken road with the kids by capturing some of the memories I want them to have forever.
I couldn't decide quite where to begin. I decided to start with one of my favorite memories of the kids. The cakes pictured were from the baby shower that was given to me at work. I am a very positive person and I take the good with the bad. During the period of my life in which I was trying to achieve pregnancy I attended many baby showers. After the termination hearing for HaLeigh and Legend in February of 2010 and after the judge had DHS contact me and tell me he had terminated the parental rights and had approved the adoption proceedings my co-workers gave me a baby shower. It was touching and marked a turning point in life where what I had longed for was becoming a reality. What I realized from failed attempts at pregnancy is that no matter who a person is a pregnancy only lasts around nine months. Being mommy lasts the rest of your life. Even though I didn't carry my children in my womb I still get to be mommy the rest of my life. I'll just consider myself blessed.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)